The Law of Kindness

I have been mulling over something for a while.  Chewing on it – trying to really let the Lord teach me what it means.  I don’t have it completely figured out yet, but He is making me aware of it’s truth in my daily circumstances.

Of all the virtues of the Proverbs 31 woman, I think I struggle with this one the most.  Proverbs 31:26 says, “She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.”  More and more I have been becoming aware of the fact that my tongue does not always speak kindness.  Whether it is my actual words, my tone of voice, or the attitude and thrust behind what I say, I need to have more kindness to those whom I am addressing.

As I was meditating on this I started to think about that word law.  What is a law?  The first thing that came to my mind was the speed limit law.  It is easily, and frequently, broken by many.  Is a law really something that can be so easily disregarded?  Next I thought about laws of physics, science, and mathematics.  We call it the law of gravity.  It is something that is always true – consistent, dependable. You can’t just decide to disregard the law of gravity.  Because it is always in effect.

I looked up the word law in the dictionary.  Here are some of the facets of this word:

• A binding custom or practice
• A rule of conduct or action
• A statement of an order or relation of phenomena that so far as is known is invariable under the given conditions

The Hebrew word for law is hr'To and it comes from the root word which means to throw.  According to TWOT {Theological Wordbook of the Old Testament}, “The word tora means basically ‘teaching’ whether it is the wise man instructing his son or God instructing Israel.” (Volume 1, page 404, word 910d).

So what does all of this have to do with my tongue?  If, as a virtuous woman, I am to have the law of kindness in the words I speak, then it must be something that is invariably true.  Kindness must be the major characteristic that others can expect every time I open my mouth to share something.  It must be a law – binding, rule of conduct, invariable under the given conditions.

I find that my tongue varies from kindness most easily in stressful situations.  I get frazzled, frustrated, or overwhelmed, and I lash out with my words.  Maybe I just speak too hurried and rudely.  Maybe I tell my little girl to be quiet and leave me alone.  Sometimes I vary from kindness when I myself have been hurt.  I want to make someone else feel the pain that I am experiencing, so I make unkind and untrue, or even exaggerated accusations.  An exaggeration is something that is not completely true, and that is not kind. Even under these conditions, my words must be invariably kind.  The circumstances don’t change the law.  It is consistent.

And if I am always speaking that which is kind, it will have an effect on others.  It will teach them how to be kind themselves.  Just like the word tora – I can be a wise woman instructing others.  That goes back to the beginning of our verse: she openeth her mouth with wisdom.  I want my children to learn the law of kindness.  And they will catch it best by watching me live it out.

“And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.” {Ephesians 4:32}

In the Way

In the summer of 2006 I had the great privilege and opportunity of completing my missionary internship in Basque, Spain with Roy & Lou Ann Keiser.  It was a wonderful summer.  I learned so much – about missions, depending on the Lord, the ups & downs of ministry, and being faithful to the place where the Lord has called you.

Mrs. Keiser now has a blog entitled In the Way.  I think you will be blessed by what you read over there!  As an artist, Mrs. Keiser has a unique perspective.  When I lived with her for two months, I realized that she had never yet met an ugly person.  She finds beauty in everything.  As an author, Mrs. Keiser seems to have a gift for looking at an ordinary circumstance and drawing a spiritual truth or application from it.

Her latest post was on the Diamond Jubilee of Queen Elizabeth II in Great Britain.  It’s just a news snippet to most of us, but I encourage you to read the lesson that Mrs. Keiser was able to draw out.  Head on over to In the Way and come away encouraged today!

{photo: Me, David, Lou Ann, & Roy Keiser at the Aqueducto in Segovia}

Consume my life…

I found this quote in the flyleaf of my Bible.  I had forgotten that I wrote it there during college.

Deuteronomy 6:5

Thinking Differently

I guess I might be described as a pessimist.  I tend to think negatively rather than positively.  But I am trying to change the way that I think.  If I am walking in the Spirit, then I will be thinking with the mind of Christ.  I am reading in Ephesians, and chapter 6 describes the Christian’s armour.  Verse 17 tells us that we have the helmet of salvation.  The helmet protects the head {obviously}.  A wound to the head would almost surely be fatal.  But we have the salvation of Christ to protect us. 

Salvation has a daily, present, practical outworking {not just the future home in heaven} called sanctification – the process of becoming like Christ.  If I am walking in sanctification today, then it will protect my head – my thinking.  So many times I know that Satan attacks me by getting me to think wrong thoughts, which lead to wrong attitudes, and wrong actions, and cause hurt and remorse.  I want my thinking to change – to be saved!

Here is how that looks to me:

• I think I can’t handle this but God’s Word says, “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” (Philippians 4:13)
• I think this isn’t fair but God says, “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.” (Jeremiah 29:11)
• I think there is so much noise and chaos in my house right now but God says, “Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee.” (Isaiah 26:3)
• I think this situation is terrible but God says, “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28)
• I think I have too much to do but God says, “And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” (2 Corinthians 12:9)
• I think my kids are so much work – why did I want to be a mom? but God says, “Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.” (Psalm 127:3)
• I think I can’t love/forgive that person but God says, “…the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.”  (Romans 5:5).  It is His love in me that I can offer to that person.
• I think I can’t get victory – it’s just my besetting sin but God says, “But thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.” (1 Corinthians 15:57) and “There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.” (1 Corinthians 10:13)

Encouragement for Moms

I have been very weary in my role as mommy lately.  I get tired of wiping bums, cleaning toys, and mediating fights.  The whining seems to drive me insane.  When I have had a few minutes to sit at my computer, I have found encouragement through several blogs.  Each day, the author of the blog I chose to read seemed to speak to exactly what I was feeling or struggling with.  So I thought I would share them with you.

• The Growing Pains of Motherhood, by The Gypsy Mama
• Stop Waiting! by Beyond Bath Time
• The Comfort of God’s Providence in Parenting, by This Journey Our Life
• Help!  I’m a New Mom, by Kim Wagner (at Beyond Bath Time)
• Motherhood, and Being There for Each Other, by Keeping Life Creative
• Forgiveness for Moms who Fail, by Beyond Bath Time
• On Comparing Yourself, by (in)courage
• Running on Air, by Keeping Life Creative
• When You’re Struggling, by Sacred Mundane

Maybe these will encourage you as well!

“And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.”
Galatians 6:9

In My Distress

It has been a rough week with my kiddos.  They have been sick, cranky, and tired and I have been running on empty because I’ve been up in the night with them.  Last night things came to a head.  I needed to find the nasal aspirator so I could put Nolan to bed.  I had misplaced.  I prayed.  I asked the Lord to help me.  But I still couldn’t find it.  I felt abandoned.  Why wouldn’t God answer such a little prayer for me?  Why wouldn’t He just help me out so I could put the kids to bed and rest myself?  I started to doubt and to blame God.  Silly, right?  Over a nasal aspirator? 

But I think God was just brining me to the end of myself.  And a few minutes after Nolan was soundly sleeping, I found that silly little object – in the trash can.  Today I read Psalm 18 in my devotions.  And I was struck by verse 6, “In my distress I called upon the LORD, and cried unto my God: he heard my voice out of his temple, and my cry came before him, even into his ears.” 

In times of distress we can always call upon the Lord.  And if we are in a right relationship with Him, then we can have confidence that He WILL hear us.  And when we march boldly into His throne room with our request, our distress, our need for assistance, we can find mercy, and grace to help in time of need (Hebrews 4:16).

I’m so glad that I don’t have to solve the problem myself.  I don’t have to stress out finding the answers.  I don’t have to doubt my God and lose faith.  I just have to call, and He will answer.  The rest of Psalm 18 showed me these things about my God…

• He can answer in powerful ways (v.7-16).  He definitely makes His presence known!
• He can deliver me (v.17-19)
• He can reward me for obedience (v.20-24)
• He can save (v.27)
• He can light the darkness (v.28).  Or…He can give me treasures in the darkness (see Isaiah 45:3).  But either way I don’t have to fear when things seem dark.
• He can help me to do what seems impossible (v.29, 34, 37)
• He can strengthen me (v.32)
• He can help me to walk the path He has set before me (v.33, 36).  Just like a mountain goat, He can make my feet narrow enough for the path, or He can widen the way before me so that I can walk in His way.
• He can sustain me, even when I feel weary to the bone (v.30-31, 35)
• He can give the victory (v.38-45)

If my God can do all of these things, then why do I not call unto Him in my distress, so that He will do these things for me?